Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Mullets and Bubblers
This is a lame way to write a blog, I know…but, I liked this one. Enjoy. Fill it out yourself and let me know the results.
1. Flip to page 18, paragraph 4 - in the book closest to you right now, what does it say?
"With disgust, my mother tore a Bounty paper towel from the roll and handed it to him. "I should just let you bleed to death for terrifying our son like that."Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs. It is sitting there begging to be finished.
2. If you stretch out your left arm as far as possible, what are you touching?
Well I had to bend it at a 90 degree angle, but I am touching the coffee table that Shannon snagged from a set at her "cushy" non-profit television job. To be more specific, I am touching a plate with crumbs from my dinner that I finished an hour ago… clean up your plate Stephanie Ann!
3. What's the last program you watched on TV?
A taped (yes I still use the VCR Tivo losers!) episode of Heroes. "Save the cheerleader, save the world!"
4. Without looking, guess what time it is.
8:45pm….actual time = 8:50pm
5. Aside from the computer, what can you hear right now?
Static snoring away. I swear that cat is part old man! It has become so much a part of my background noise I almost don't notice it. Look at him laying there on his back like a dead raccoon bloated on the side of the highway. I love that cat!
6. When was the last time you were outside and what did you do?
Besides the walks to and from the car…
I was out on our balcony the other day taking pics of the geese and ducks on our pond. They were in this crop circle like pattern… I think plotting to take over the world.
7. What are you wearing?
A black t-shirt and pink, black and brown striped jammie bottoms. Wow, my shirt coordinates with my jammie pants… truly a first!
8. Did you dream last night? If you did, what about?
I am sure it was my usual erotic Vince Vaughn caper with him whispering little things that make me giggle.
9. When was the last time you laughed?
Um… see number 8. Actually, I laugh a lot. I love it! I just know I am going to be one of those old ladies who says things like, "I laughed so hard I tinkled"… wait, I already say that! I also like to make other people laugh. In my fantasy life I am a brilliant comedian.
10. What's on the walls, in the room you're in right now?
Well, as I look around… I see some bitchin' decorating sense. Man, who made these brave innovative decisions on where to place mismatched artwork, clocks and that window thingy with the vine? I also see a clump of cat fur hovering in the corner near the ceiling…wonder how it got there.
11. Have you seen anything strange lately?
Where I work there is a big parking lot that is shared by a Dairy Queen. Several people use this lot to do their walking. Usually old people with a small vanilla cone in hand. The other day one of the usual walkers had on red pumps… I mean RED. She paired them with some black socks and tan trousers. Maybe she was breaking them in so that she can wear them in a community theatre production of A Chorus Line… hmmm.
12. What's the last film you saw?
I have recently resumed my duties of consuming mass quantities of film. Recently, I have seen Borat, Stranger Than Fiction and A Good Year. Borat – highly recommend! Sasha Baron Cohen is pretty much the ballsiest guy on film. S. T. F. – the Will Ferrell version of the Truman Show career move that Jim Carrey did. I am on the fence about this one. A Good Year – Russell Crowe won me over in this. Go see it.
13. What is your screen saver?
Probably violating all kinds of copyright laws with it, but I have the Gieco gecko holding a cup of tea. I love that little guy and his accent. Give Vince Vaughn that accent and you'd have undoubtedly the perfect man.
14. If you became a multimillionaire, what would you do with the money?
First of all… multi seems kind of extreme. Besides giving a million each to my mom, dad, and sisters… I would purchase an old Victorian home for my mom close to the Twin Cities (selfish, I know) and renovate it complete with a decked out office so she can write steamy romance novels. She would also need a car to visit me on the weekends… a red mustang convertible. I would buy my dad a hobby farm with parts of it run down so he has something to occupy his time since he will HAVE to quit his job because the farm is close to the Twin Cities. Also, a truck of some kind so he can visit me on weekends. I would pay for Sarah to study Computer Animation and also to study fine art in Italy. I would arrange for Shannon an apprenticeship with Tim Burton and probably a trip to London, cuz if she is reading this she is jealous Sarah is going to Italy. And last, I would give a grant to CaringBridge that specifies it is used for purchasing computers for all hospitals that promote it… I would also selfishly want a plaque at each one proclaiming my generosity.
15. Tell us something about yourself that most people don't know.
I had a mullet when I was a kid. There I said it. I don't think this is a terrible thing since it was the 80s and most of the population adopted this party in the back hairdo.
16. What event shaped your life the most?
Wow… this is one of those questions that really makes you dig deep. I think I am going to go with my brother's death. I have been jarred out of my thinking that I have all the time in the world. I made the decision to quit my job so that I can live my life a little more because of that. And I do appreciate my family more. Unfortunately this event also shaped the cynical look on everything that I have. I miss him terribly and am angry that he is gone!
17. Do you like dancing?
I like the night life. I like to boogie.
18. George Bush?
Wait, are you asking me if I like him as a person or as the president? Oh, never mind… the answer is the same.
19. Bubbler or water fountain?
Bubblers are for drinking… water fountains are for throwing pennies and making wishes!
20. What is the best dream you ever had?
I love this question because I get to talk about my brother again. I have had several delicious glimpses of him in my dreams, but one stands out… I am nailing together a baby cradle and am able to put together the frame with no problems. When I try to put a bottom in it, I notice I have run out of wood. This is the most devastating thing to me for some reason. I begin to sob and bury my face in my hands. Then, I get a tap on my shoulder. When I turn my head Andrew is standing there with a big, comforting smile. He walks over to the cradle and puts his arms under it. I woke up with tear stained cheeks and this feeling of peace… it was the BEST!
Mullets and Bubblers
This is a lame way to write a blog, I know…but, I liked this one. Enjoy. Fill it out yourself and let me know the results.
1. Flip to page 18, paragraph 4 - in the book closest to you right now, what does it say?
"With disgust, my mother tore a Bounty paper towel from the roll and handed it to him. "I should just let you bleed to death for terrifying our son like that."Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs. It is sitting there begging to be finished.
2. If you stretch out your left arm as far as possible, what are you touching?
Well I had to bend it at a 90 degree angle, but I am touching the coffee table that Shannon snagged from a set at her "cushy" non-profit television job. To be more specific, I am touching a plate with crumbs from my dinner that I finished an hour ago… clean up your plate Stephanie Ann!
3. What's the last program you watched on TV?
A taped (yes I still use the VCR Tivo losers!) episode of Heroes. "Save the cheerleader, save the world!"
4. Without looking, guess what time it is.
8:45pm….actual time = 8:50pm
5. Aside from the computer, what can you hear right now?
Static snoring away. I swear that cat is part old man! It has become so much a part of my background noise I almost don't notice it. Look at him laying there on his back like a dead raccoon bloated on the side of the highway. I love that cat!
6. When was the last time you were outside and what did you do?
Besides the walks to and from the car…
I was out on our balcony the other day taking pics of the geese and ducks on our pond. They were in this crop circle like pattern… I think plotting to take over the world.
7. What are you wearing?
A black t-shirt and pink, black and brown striped jammie bottoms. Wow, my shirt coordinates with my jammie pants… truly a first!
8. Did you dream last night? If you did, what about?
I am sure it was my usual erotic Vince Vaughn caper with him whispering little things that make me giggle.
9. When was the last time you laughed?
Um… see number 8. Actually, I laugh a lot. I love it! I just know I am going to be one of those old ladies who says things like, "I laughed so hard I tinkled"… wait, I already say that! I also like to make other people laugh. In my fantasy life I am a brilliant comedian.
10. What's on the walls, in the room you're in right now?
Well, as I look around… I see some bitchin' decorating sense. Man, who made these brave innovative decisions on where to place mismatched artwork, clocks and that window thingy with the vine? I also see a clump of cat fur hovering in the corner near the ceiling…wonder how it got there.
11. Have you seen anything strange lately?
Where I work there is a big parking lot that is shared by a Dairy Queen. Several people use this lot to do their walking. Usually old people with a small vanilla cone in hand. The other day one of the usual walkers had on red pumps… I mean RED. She paired them with some black socks and tan trousers. Maybe she was breaking them in so that she can wear them in a community theatre production of A Chorus Line… hmmm.
12. What's the last film you saw?
I have recently resumed my duties of consuming mass quantities of film. Recently, I have seen Borat, Stranger Than Fiction and A Good Year. Borat – highly recommend! Sasha Baron Cohen is pretty much the ballsiest guy on film. S. T. F. – the Will Ferrell version of the Truman Show career move that Jim Carrey did. I am on the fence about this one. A Good Year – Russell Crowe won me over in this. Go see it.
13. What is your screen saver?
Probably violating all kinds of copyright laws with it, but I have the Gieco gecko holding a cup of tea. I love that little guy and his accent. Give Vince Vaughn that accent and you'd have undoubtedly the perfect man.
14. If you became a multimillionaire, what would you do with the money?
First of all… multi seems kind of extreme. Besides giving a million each to my mom, dad, and sisters… I would purchase an old Victorian home for my mom close to the Twin Cities (selfish, I know) and renovate it complete with a decked out office so she can write steamy romance novels. She would also need a car to visit me on the weekends… a red mustang convertible. I would buy my dad a hobby farm with parts of it run down so he has something to occupy his time since he will HAVE to quit his job because the farm is close to the Twin Cities. Also, a truck of some kind so he can visit me on weekends. I would pay for Sarah to study Computer Animation and also to study fine art in Italy. I would arrange for Shannon an apprenticeship with Tim Burton and probably a trip to London, cuz if she is reading this she is jealous Sarah is going to Italy. And last, I would give a grant to CaringBridge that specifies it is used for purchasing computers for all hospitals that promote it… I would also selfishly want a plaque at each one proclaiming my generosity.
15. Tell us something about yourself that most people don't know.
I had a mullet when I was a kid. There I said it. I don't think this is a terrible thing since it was the 80s and most of the population adopted this party in the back hairdo.
16. What event shaped your life the most?
Wow… this is one of those questions that really makes you dig deep. I think I am going to go with my brother's death. I have been jarred out of my thinking that I have all the time in the world. I made the decision to quit my job so that I can live my life a little more because of that. And I do appreciate my family more. Unfortunately this event also shaped the cynical look on everything that I have. I miss him terribly and am angry that he is gone!
17. Do you like dancing?
I like the night life. I like to boogie.
18. George Bush?
Wait, are you asking me if I like him as a person or as the president? Oh, never mind… the answer is the same.
19. Bubbler or water fountain?
Bubblers are for drinking… water fountains are for throwing pennies and making wishes!
20. What is the best dream you ever had?
I love this question because I get to talk about my brother again. I have had several delicious glimpses of him in my dreams, but one stands out… I am nailing together a baby cradle and am able to put together the frame with no problems. When I try to put a bottom in it, I notice I have run out of wood. This is the most devastating thing to me for some reason. I begin to sob and bury my face in my hands. Then, I get a tap on my shoulder. When I turn my head Andrew is standing there with a big, comforting smile. He walks over to the cradle and puts his arms under it. I woke up with tear stained cheeks and this feeling of peace… it was the BEST!
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