Out Damn Spot!

I have this irritating sore under my tongue. And, as I do with all irritating mouth infractions, I am obsessively playing with it. My bottom teeth are acting like a scraper to irritate and investigate it. This is making it flare up like a beast… a beast with horns and razor sharp teeth.

How did it get there? How do I evict it?

It has been really pissing me of. Like when I wanted to enjoy my Island Mango White Tea. It apparently hates hot substances and roars back causing me to scrape at it with my teeth to shut it up. It causes me to have a bit of a speech impediment. I am an enunciator and it makes me mumble… the bastard!

Another artist’s rendering…

I got news for you mister blemish on the underbelly of the strongest muscle in my body, I have some remedies straight from my mamma and grandmamma.

Be prepared for a onslaught of crushed up Tums followed by a gargle of salt water and an ice cube! You are going down you canker from hell!